Parenting Series: Control

Can you believe we only have three chapters left!!!   I know.. time flies eh?

Today’s chapter is about control…and I like this chapter.  Frankly it fits where we are at in the raising of our lad.   We are giving him more and more choices about things and it’s flummoxing him.   He’s such a people pleaser that we are trying to give him no-fail options and he’s still struggling.  I think with time it will come, but right now he’s just flummoxed. 

You see.. I figure if he starts out small… when we can help guide his actions and help him consider the larger ramifications of things in the light of who  GOD wants us to be, it will serve him well in the long run.

We ran into that today with a “game troll” today that has the lad all upset and wanting to respond to him, and we told him.. Let it Go.  Don’t feed the troll.  Ignore him and eventually he will stop (or at least we’ll get used to ignoring him). The lad didn’t understand why or how that would work and why he couldn’t yell at this troublemaker.  Which gave us a chance to talking about how if you don’t feed the troll it helps bring peace again.  How God calls us to go beyond ourselves.  It’s good to help him think these types of things through.

So as we work through this choice and decision making time with our lad we need to consider his needs.
For Guidance, protection, instruction, wisdom, authority, rules, structure, preparation, understanding, confrontation, discipline, warning, love, forgiveness, and security.

But beyond this wonderful list there is a deeper need that our children have. 
To understand their sin so they will call out to God for mercy.
To understand the nature of sin so they don’t negate it’s danger
To understand that their problem is not with their parents, but with God. 
To understand that sin produces behaviour problems.
To understand their only real help is to run to the forgiving grace of God.

The end is God.  That’s where it is.
Working through decisions, you need to see God’s help.

This is what I need to do with my lad…help him to see God in his decision-making, helping him, guiding him, forgiving him.   This is something he is needful more and more of seeing.
Seeing it this deeper need, makes the letting go of a lad an easier thing. A good thing as he matures and becomes more of the person God has called him to be.